I am a self-proclaimed cheese fiend. Nearly all the food at my family gatherings contains cheese and if the world were coming to an end, you would find me facedown in fromage. I’ve explored cheese caves in Europe, experienced tastings with 40+ varieties, and one of my favorite kitchen hacks is making my own paneer (Indian cheese) and ricotta. My wife might not recall but one of the first questions I asked her when we got together was, “You’re not lactose intolerant, are you?” #Priorities. So, when my editor told me to review Fo Cheezy Twisted Meltz in St. Pete Beach, I was pretty stoked.
Fo’Cheezy is “comfort food” with a stoner twist. The throwback vibe is loud with ’90s decor and graffiti-splattered walls (courtesy of St. Pete muralists the Vitale Bros.). The menu novelizes the nostalgic classics like grilled cheese, Twinkies, cookie dough balls, and PB&Js. There’s also cheese curds, apple pies, tater tots, and French toast. It’s a lot to digest (literally and figuratively) but it’s one milkshake away from carnival food.
The grilled cheese sandwiches are over-the-top stuffed — and way too greasy for my taste. While I appreciate intriguing ingredients like bierria beef short rib, green chili dijonnaise, and bahn mi slaw, it felt like they were trying too hard to be hip. Grilled cheeses like Seoul Brother ($16 – Korean BBQ) and the Cluck Norris ($16) felt like a stretch. In my opinion, the menu is glorified food truck fare at best.
Fo Cheezy: Stoner Comfort Food
I ordered the Cheesy Caprese ($15) with Buffalo mozzarella, provolone, whipped ricotta, basil pesto, bruschetta tomatoes, picked red onions, and balsamic syrup, served on butter-drenched sourdough. The picked onions added a subtle pop that cut through all of the fatty cheese. The flavors were almost there, but I couldn’t get past the fuzzy film of grease coating my mouth after each bite. It made for a displeasurable eating experience, something I’ve never described about a grilled cheese.
In addition, I also had the Mac Daddy Rolls ($8). Two, massive egg rolls stuffed with mac and cheese, rolled in crushed Cheetohs, and served with honey barbecue sauce. Had I been blitzed at the time, I’m sure they would have tasted delicious. But I found the egg roll skin to be undercooked and chewy, and the mac and cheese underseasoned. Overall, they were messy to eat.
If really you want the full carnival food experience, get the Dough Boyz ($9). It’s Fo’Cheezy’s chocolate chip cookie egg rolls with churro dust, salted caramel hot fudge, whipped cream, Oreo crumb and a cookie crisp. Or splurge on a hand-spun milkshake (all $10) like the Butterface with vanilla ice cream, Nutella, chopped Butterfingers, and whipped cream. Regardless, you’ll be in for a sugar rush like none other.
If you’re a fan of dairy and carbs (and why wouldn’t you be?), this joint’s for you.
Fo’Cheezy Twisted Metz, 6305 Gulf Blvd., St. Pete Beach. Sun. – Thurs., 11 a.m. – 10 p.m., Fri. – Sat., 11 a.m. – 2 a.m. 727-827-7677, focheezy.com